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Responding to Community Violence

June 10, 2022 by Ashley Bono LPC, LMFT

            May 24th, 2022 many children woke up to go to school and learn just like any normal day. They put on their backpacks, grabbed their lunch boxes, and headed out the door to the bus stop or out to the car for their parents to drop them off. For nineteen children and two teachers in the city of Uvalde, Texas, they went off to school never suspecting what would happen. During these times of tragedy, we as a nation and as a community tend to sit at this scene of horror and ask the questions, “What do we do with this? How do we reach out and help?” But we often come up short when we try to answer these questions. The sheer horror of an act of violence of this degree tends to paralyze us from doing anything. Because of this horror we tend to get highly emotional and start to fight with each other because we think that we can offer a solution to prevent something like this from happening again. But I’d like to offer a challenge to each and every one of us. Instead of fighting with each other about what happened, how about we simply be present, be available, and be kind?

            Let’s be honest with ourselves and each other. During times like these all of us what to jump in and do something. We want to change the fact that lives were lost or homes destroyed, and reverse things back to the way they were before the carnage occurred. We want to stop these terrible things from happening again. As a result, we tend to get lost in our emotions and argue with each other about what would be a viable solution to prevent the violence or even reach out to the victims of the violence.  But does this emotionalism really help anyone? I think we can safely say that, no, it does not. Instead of arguing with each other or jumping into action without thinking, what if we were to simply be there for these hurting families? We can’t offer any answers to the many questions that are swirling around in all of our heads about what to do or not to do in this situation. It is during times like this, that simply being physically present can be very healing in and of itself. Showing the victims of this violence that we as a neighborhood, community, and nation are here for them may be more healing than we realize.

            I think we can all say that healing from a tragedy of this magnitude is an active process. There are needs that must be met, and some of these needs can only be met by certain people. This may require each and every one of us to step up to the plate and being willing to offer something to alleviate suffering and pain. We must be available and be ready when those needs are brought to awareness. Sometimes even asking the question of, “What is needed at this time?” can actually bring targeted awareness to specific needs that must be met sooner rather than later. I think we all know that we can’t eliminate the pain that our neighbors are feeling or experiencing entirely, but we can do something to at least speed up the healing process.

            Never ever underestimate the power of a kind word or deed. Many times, we tend to disregard small acts because they don’t impact that many people. I would beg to differ. Small acts of kindness can set off a chain reaction that could change lives entirely. A kind word can help lift people’s spirits during a crisis. A kind action like taking a friend to coffee, can show that we care when they are struggling and provide them with a healing presence. Making a point to be kind during situations like the one in Uvalde can bring healing in its most powerful form. It shows that there are still good people in this world who are willing to do the right thing and value human beings.

            It is during times of tragedy that we must show that are a unified community that will be there for those who are impacted. This is a challenge due to the number of emotions that people are feeling or struggling with. The pain and grief that we feel right now is very, very real. The shock and horror that we feel is also very real and we can’t deny that something needs to be done. But being willing to sit with our neighbors, and reach out a kind, loving hand during their time of mourning and pain, can provide something that people need desperately. That is to know that they are loved, valued, and seen.

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Kathleen Bradford
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Kathleen Bradford
February 12, 2024

Ray has been an extremely effective therapist utilizing a multitude of different techniques, including talk therapy and EMDR. He is very intuitive, kind, and sensitive to his patient's needs. Cannot recommend him enough.

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Lauren Goodley
February 9, 2024

I love this place. Office is super helpful for scheduling and payments. I do all my appointments online. My counselor Raymund Begaye is always professional and helpful, and offers different therapies including talk therapy and EMDR. Counseling with Ray has improved my quality of life and ability to handle, and enjoy (!), my life.

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Ryan Dicke
February 9, 2024

I have dealt with 2 therapists in the past, and I can tell you from experience that Raymund Begaye is world class. He has all the wisdom, grace and savvy of Hannibal Lector without the cannibalistic tendencies. Always selfless, supportive, and non judgemental, meeting Raymund has been a huge blessing in my life. I know from the bottom of my heart that he got into this business because he cares about people and the human element. He also thinks outside of the box. His knowledge and ability to conduct EMDR sessions have been pure gold. I was skeptical at first about EMDR, but after several sessions with Raymund I can honestly say past traumatic experiences that have kept me in a state of bondage, are not as intense as they once were. Raymund is a true American hero in many ways. He saved many lives fighting for our great country, and he continues to save lives by providing hope to the hopeless.

Stefanie Anderson
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Stefanie Anderson
February 9, 2024

I've been seeing Ray for over 3 years now. He has helped me work through so much of my trauma. We started with talk therapy and it was a big help. As we opened up through my past traumas, we utilized the EMDR therapy, and let me tell you, it works wonders. I'm not sure of the exact science behind why EMDR works but I promise it does. I've come along way from the start of my therapy journey. Ray is very patient, understanding, and even when you think he doesn't get it, he does. He's always been very reassuring and has let me ease into dealing with my past. I think I found my therapist for life because before him, I had gone through several therapists that never made me feel like I'm being heard. I would recommend the EMDR therapy to anyone. Thanks InMindOut for employing such a wonderful therapist. Please don't let him go anywhere lol.

Faith Harris
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Faith Harris
February 8, 2024

My therapist has been Ray B since fall of 2021. I was diagnosed with PTSD after the death of my husband. We were together 24 years and have a son. I know I'm alive today thanks to God and Ray. His techniques, patience, experience, care, effort, ideas and many more I can't think of, have been amazing. Ray is a blessing in my life.

Maggie Anaya
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Maggie Anaya
February 3, 2024

Great therapists, always friendly

Charles Earley
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Charles Earley
January 17, 2024

Canceled 3 weeks in a row.

Jessica Wicklund
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Jessica Wicklund
December 25, 2023

I saw your video on FailArmy. Sorry your beautiful ferns got stolen. If I ever make it to your area I’ll have to stop by and check it out. Looks like a cool place!

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