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Children and Grief

August 18, 2021 by Ashley Bono LPC, LMFT

     As adults we can very firmly attest that grief is hard enough for us to understand or heal from. Can you imagine what it is like for a child or teenager to move through those difficult stages? The challenge that children face whenever they are going through grief is that depending on their age, they do not understand the permanency of death. A second challenge that children face is that they don’t have a firm grasp or understanding of their emotions. This leaves us, as adults and as parents, how do we help our children through this difficult process?

1. If your kids cry, let them cry. Our feelings are meant to be felt! This includes feelings of hurt, anger, and sadness. Our children must be allowed to feel their emotions even if they are not pleasant.

2. Don’t be afraid to have a tough, feelings talk. As a parent, you are the one that your children want to talk to whenever they feel difficult feelings. You are the one that they want to know is going to be there for them through the tough times. Don’t be afraid to just sit and listen to your children talk about their raw feelings about the loss, and don’t be afraid to tell them that it’s okay to feel pain.

3. Don’t ever underestimate the power of touch. Some children need a hug in order to feel safe and secure from unsure world around them. That’s where you, mom and dad, come in. A hug from you can help your child feel the safety that they crave during times of grief. Sometimes the best thing that you can do for your child during times of grief is to hold them and let them cry if that is what they need.

4. Trust your child’s skills. We must be willing to trust our children to be able to say what it is that will help them heal. We also have to trust our kids to be their own problem solvers. This is especially true during times of pain. If your child is struggling with a painful situation, you can always ask these questions, “What do you need from me right now? How do you want to solve this problem?” You might be surprised what your children will tell you.

No matter what the circumstances may be, never underestimate your power as a parent in your child’s life. Times of pain are crucial for parents to be involved. At the end of the day, any child needs one very important thing: their parents.

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Kathleen Bradford
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Kathleen Bradford
February 12, 2024

Ray has been an extremely effective therapist utilizing a multitude of different techniques, including talk therapy and EMDR. He is very intuitive, kind, and sensitive to his patient's needs. Cannot recommend him enough.

Lauren Goodley
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Lauren Goodley
February 9, 2024

I love this place. Office is super helpful for scheduling and payments. I do all my appointments online. My counselor Raymund Begaye is always professional and helpful, and offers different therapies including talk therapy and EMDR. Counseling with Ray has improved my quality of life and ability to handle, and enjoy (!), my life.

Ryan Dicke
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Ryan Dicke
February 9, 2024

I have dealt with 2 therapists in the past, and I can tell you from experience that Raymund Begaye is world class. He has all the wisdom, grace and savvy of Hannibal Lector without the cannibalistic tendencies. Always selfless, supportive, and non judgemental, meeting Raymund has been a huge blessing in my life. I know from the bottom of my heart that he got into this business because he cares about people and the human element. He also thinks outside of the box. His knowledge and ability to conduct EMDR sessions have been pure gold. I was skeptical at first about EMDR, but after several sessions with Raymund I can honestly say past traumatic experiences that have kept me in a state of bondage, are not as intense as they once were. Raymund is a true American hero in many ways. He saved many lives fighting for our great country, and he continues to save lives by providing hope to the hopeless.

Stefanie Anderson
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Stefanie Anderson
February 9, 2024

I've been seeing Ray for over 3 years now. He has helped me work through so much of my trauma. We started with talk therapy and it was a big help. As we opened up through my past traumas, we utilized the EMDR therapy, and let me tell you, it works wonders. I'm not sure of the exact science behind why EMDR works but I promise it does. I've come along way from the start of my therapy journey. Ray is very patient, understanding, and even when you think he doesn't get it, he does. He's always been very reassuring and has let me ease into dealing with my past. I think I found my therapist for life because before him, I had gone through several therapists that never made me feel like I'm being heard. I would recommend the EMDR therapy to anyone. Thanks InMindOut for employing such a wonderful therapist. Please don't let him go anywhere lol.

Faith Harris
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Faith Harris
February 8, 2024

My therapist has been Ray B since fall of 2021. I was diagnosed with PTSD after the death of my husband. We were together 24 years and have a son. I know I'm alive today thanks to God and Ray. His techniques, patience, experience, care, effort, ideas and many more I can't think of, have been amazing. Ray is a blessing in my life.

Maggie Anaya
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Maggie Anaya
February 3, 2024

Great therapists, always friendly

Charles Earley
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Charles Earley
January 17, 2024

Canceled 3 weeks in a row.

Jessica Wicklund
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Jessica Wicklund
December 25, 2023

I saw your video on FailArmy. Sorry your beautiful ferns got stolen. If I ever make it to your area I’ll have to stop by and check it out. Looks like a cool place!

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