School is in startup mode, and students are being asked to turn on their brainwork to high volume. But it’s not just students who can benefit from deeper thinking. Therapists ask those who seek help to stop and reflect on meaning. Some therapists integrate what we call bibliotherapy, a form of therapy that integrates reading […]
Therapist Blog
Go Easy On Yourself!
Let’s talk about taking it easy. In life there will always be times that we feel we are not at our best, falling behind, have too much on our plates, etc. No matter how prepared we are for what life throws at us or stable we are feeling, problems will arise-that’s a fact. The most […]
The Mental Health Benefits of Volunteering
More often than not, when a client comes in for services and expresses a need to find purpose in life, one of the suggestions I make is volunteering. Some look puzzled at the idea, while other’s seem to have that “ah ha,” moment. For most volunteering is a positive, productive and fulfilling experience. In recent […]
30 Seconds to Intimacy
In the grand scheme of things, 30 seconds may not sound like a long time. What if that 30 seconds were the difference in a meaningful connection with your partner? Intimacy comes in different forms, but there are four main forms which we will focus on. These four forms of intimacy are the building blocks […]
Combating Shame
I see a lot of different emotions when people come into my office. But one of the most predominant emotions that I’ve seen is the emotion of shame. Nine times out of ten people come into therapy with regrets and burdens that have caused them a lot of problems over the years. This shame, however, […]
Responses to Manipulation
Sometimes in relationships there comes a time when we realize we are being manipulated. Manipulative communication subverts respect for selfish gain. That may be achieved but the cost will be trust in the relationship. It’s best to spot manipulative communication tactics and know how to avoid them. 1. Making statements disguised as a question. For […]
Empower Your Children to Believe They Belong
Children who do not believe they belong or matter do not feel valued unconditionally. To help themselves feel as though they are important, bully others, be demanding or withdraw as a form of punishment. These children might even act as if they think they are better than other people (even though they don’t believe they […]
Who Makes the Rules for What is Beautiful?
Perhaps these days it’s a good question to consider. You can find some surprising practices studying the social tenets of beauty in various cultures. Centuries ago, some places in China practiced foot binding where young girls feet were broken and tightly bound. Why? Because “lotus” feet were considered more beautiful. And I remember the Masai […]
Shifting Goals of Misbehavior
Shifting the Goal of Attention: Ignore child when using misbehavior to get attention Pay attention to child when they are not asking for attention “Say it” only once and then act Set up routines Plan special times to play and let them lead Use encouragement, not praise Return responsibility to the child Redirect by involving […]
Empowering Children to Have Courage
Children who do not have courage do not take risks and tend to give up without trying. They frequently avoid challenges. As children develop courage, they are more willing to try new things. They begin to believe they can succeed, and they feel hopeful. Children with courage believe they can handle difficult situations and changes. […]
